STEP OUT OF THE “TRAUMA DRAMA” WHIRLWIND
Emotions by nature are dramatic. Nowhere is this truer than when we feel caught up in the whirlwind of the Trauma and Drama Zone. It can evoke fear being there, but it can also evoke exhilaration as we are whipsawed through events seemingly out of our control.
While there will always be events in our life that happen out of our control, if we find ourselves frequently in the Trauma and Drama Zone, it may be a sign that we are addicted to living there. Maybe we grew up in a chaotic household, which we repeat with a roommate, since it feels uncomfortably familiar. Maybe we get into habits of procrastination, since we thrive on the excitement of pulling off projects at the last minute. Or maybe we are in a marriage that lacks passion and connection, unless dramatic issues bring us together.
When we access our calm center in the eye (“I”) of the emotional hurricane, we may still need to deal with difficult situations. However, our True Self at the Center, is not touched by the emotional upheaval that often engulfs others. If you’ve ever been in an emergency situation, look around and it will be obvious who is operating from their calm center and who is getting emotionally whipped around by the external chaos.
It may be helpful to remember several things to pull yourself back to your calm center:
Own the fact that you are not your emotions. Our emotions are clues to our needs and who we are, but they are NOT who we are. Until we are able to fully understand this, we may be caught up in the drama of emotional whirlwinds without being really open to hearing the underlying messages that our emotional guidance system is there to help us acknowledge.
Look for the patterns in your emotions. If we pay attention, we often see there are common patterns of emotions that play out repeatedly in our lives, despite the changing faces and the variety of scenarios we encounter. Recognizing these patterns, helps us become our own observer, who tunes into our emotions for the deeper truth of what we need to understand to clear the pattern.
Rid Yourself of the Victim Mentality. Everyone encounters challenging situations from time to time. There are circumstances you may find yourself in where you feel victimized, such as having a wallet forcibly taken or having a co-worker betray you to get a promotion. There may be more extreme situations of victimization such as being abused as a child, violently raped, tortured, or falsely imprisoned. There is, however, a difference between being victimized, and perpetually thinking of yourself as a victim.
If you are in constant crisis and your life is full of high drama, it make be a sign you are addicted to being a victim. There will be no shortage of other people to blame or evidence to point to for why your life is so difficult. If you find you are perpetual victim mode, it may require some deep soul searching and self-honesty to bring to conscious awareness what thoughts and behaviors are creating this life pattern.
For more information about stepping out of victimization see:
Blog Post: Root Out Old Victim Patterns
Book: Removing Your Mask: No More Hiding from Your Truth about living from from gullibility and victimization
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